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"Matt Ingebretson and Jake Weisman, Our Close Friends" is the two-hundred-nineteenth episode of Hollywood Handbook.

Official Earwolf Page

Earwolf Synopsis Edit

Sean and Hayes are joined by MATT INGEBRETSON and JAKE WEISMAN from their new show Corporate on Comedy Central to tell stories.

This episode is sponsored by Casper Mattresses (code: HANDBOOK) and Blue Apron.

Notes & Memorable Quotes Edit

Pre-Guest Segment Edit

  • Sean over the theme song: I'm on the porch with Martina Navratilova, Martina McBride, Martina Hingis, and the Gorburger. And we're drinking sweet tea and we're checking our various joints to feel if the storm is getting closer
  • Sean's foot swelled up like a bee's nest
    • Swelling in the same manner as a bee's nest - it's still a normal size of a foot
  • Gorburger cracks a one-liner so hard that Sean, Martina, Martina, and Martina are in stitches. Sean laughs so hard that sweet tea gushes out of his nose and splashes all over everyone.
    Martina3gorburger

    Martina, Martina, Martina, Gorburger

  • Then Sean says, "Well! I guess we don't have to worry about getting wet from the storm anymore!"
  • Hayes asks: Can we leave Gorburger out of this? Do we have to punish the Gorburger? He trusts people! He believes his friend!
    • Gorburger (AKA G-man AKA Gorby) tried to eat Sean

Guest Segment Edit

  • Matt thinks it's tragic what happened to Gorby. He's worried about him and hopes he doesn't do a Louis fuck-up apology
  • Matt sends a gift basket once or twice a week to Gorburger with: almonds, Snickers, popcorn, Jewish Candy (R), and tissues
  • Hayes asks about Matt and Jake's show Corporate and the billboard campaign that shook Sean to his core
  • Matt is too scared to talk about the billboards, but Jake is brave enough to tell the tale
    CorporateBillboard

    super fucked-up billboard campaign

    • So Matt goes on to explain the initial campaign from the network was to have a picture of Matt and Jake and it would say something stupid like, "Welcome to your new friends, Matt and Jakey"
    • The final version is sick and twisted
  • Jake wants to know how Sean was "shaken to his core"
    • Sean: Marketing and general advertising traditionally makes one feel happy and excited (A new toothpaste flavor, wow!)
    • Sean breaks down his billboard reading experience:
      • "Comedy" : we're safe
      • "Central" : ok, I know that timezone
      • "Is" : starting to get a feeling in the pit of my stomach like - uh-oh
      • "Corporate" :
        1. Is this true?
        2. This is disappointing
        3. I'm scared!
      • At the time, Sean was in his Suzuki Swift
  • Sean loves wheels and motors and all of it
  • Sometimes Sean will drive down to the NASCAR track and drive in the middle of a race to see how he stacks up against these so-called pro drivers
    • the way to really win a race is to have fun
  • Hayes sometimes will buy a ticket to watch Sean's impromptu races
  • Hayes's section (soda section) at the track has all the sodas you can drink
    • You have to keep drinking through the whole race
    • You also have to fill out forms that ask about your thoughts on the soda
    • You can't do suicides - they're very strict about no suicides
      • They make you open your mouth to confirm there's no soda in there before taking a sip of a new soda
      • The security guy's name is Brangt, and he does not wash his hands
  • Hayes recounts how when Sean busts through the wall, and all the other drivers totally forget about the race and they are just chasing Sean to get him to stop
  • Then right before Sean is about to win the race he hits the brakes and peaces out
  • Matt and Jake ran into Mr. Brainwash on the night that Comedy Central was rolling out the billboards
    • They don't have a great relationship with Mr. Brainwash
    • He was putting up posters that said, "Comedy Central is Fun"
  • Sumner Redstone is in the room - at Comedy Central - as a corpse that is not being preserved
  • Sean asks, "Do you believe in free will?"
    • Jake: "Nothing's free"
    • Matt: "Am I allowed to choose what flavor toothpaste I use?"
  • Hayes becomes upset when Sean accidentally refers to the Napster guy as Sean Preston

Recurring Segments Edit

  • (unknown)

Recurring Jokes Edit

  • Sean's Dad - Sean's Dad is a retired cop, that's one reason why Sean knows so much about the law

Ads Edit

  • Blue Apron - Chef Kevin talks about eating a whole pineapple everyday for 30 days for Blue Apron-Whole30 Challenge.
    • Enter Chef Kevin's personal code KevinWhole30 and get a free pineapple.
      • The first 3 people to try Kevin's code... the first two won't work but the third one will.
    • Sean reminds them they really have to get this ad moving
    • One of Sean's boys / tight-homies from way back tried Whole30 and he went from dud to stud
      • Sean's friend really got into the Whole30 scene, and his body was transformed
      • Engineer Brett reminds the boys that they really need to get moving on this ad
    • ...and that one-of-my-boys was Hayes

Episode Photos Edit

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